Transvestia

I tiptoed to the long mirror on the door, avoiding making noise with my heels after all, my wife had left. One knee across the other, model-style. Not bad, if you don't look at the face. That's still an electronics sales executive - we'll fix him in Paris. The rest of the reflection: A bit thick in the waist and thin in the hips. But we can buy things to fix these details. A waist cincher is called a serre-taille, and it will be fun to scissor some pads out of thick sponge rubber and fit them under a pretty long-leg girdle.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door, inches away. “You are leaving today, monsieur?"

It was the maid. Checkout time was noon. "Yes, in a few minutes."

"Tres bien, monsieur."

My heart had skipped a beat, but I was glad I had thought to bolt the door when I came in. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Instinctively, I had put a protective arm across my bosom!

Odd how slitherily trousers go on over nylons. If you knew, you could see a suggestion of the bra through the back of the shirt, but I had to rejiggle the flesh in the front to get flatter contours that wouldn't show through the suit coat. Black socks, tie, suitcase, briefcase, tip to the chambermaid placed on the end table, recheck the room, look under the bed (feel that lovely tug of the garters on the nylons as I bend over!), so O.K., off goes the respectable grey suited sales executive to Paris.

Traffic was lighter than usual coming into town, so I got in earlier than I expected. And yes, this was the late-open night at Galeries Lafayette, the Macy's of Paris. A parking space opened up as I approached on the side street where I had sometimes found a place to park. Everything was going for me.

On the way to Galeries Lafayette I saw a nice small dress shop with suits and dresses with simple lines and tasteful accessories in the window. By now I was feeling that nobody would run screaming if I asked to buy something feminine for myself, so I stepped inside. The young clerk was only slightly flustered when I asked what she had in my size. "For a masquerade party. There will be a prize for the most realistic one."